Corporate Welfare & Disasters

You ever get a hankerin’ for a 400hp car that could get ya from whoa to 60 mile an hour in 6 seconds AND get 100 miles to a gallon to boot? Ain’t that every teenager’s dream? (And maybe a certain geezer too.) Well, they got ‘em now, son. ‘Course they ain’t cheap. ‘Bout $100,000 for one. And them dealers ain’t in every town like Fords and Chevys. But it ain’t no joke either. This here Fisker Automotive Co. out there in California is sellin’ a sport sedan out there right now.

I hear tell these Fisker fellas got some mighty slick engineers too. Like instead of designin’ that car from scratch, first they went shoppin'. They looked for what they could use that somebody else already made. You know, like door handles and windshield wiper motors and such. Tain’t like they stole nothin’. They’re just payin’ to use somebody else’s parts. Just like you and me neighbor. A trip to the Ben Franklin might save a body one heap of work, ya know?

Reckon they got some slick businessmen too. I mean, you’d think somebody that sells $100,000 cars, could do it without getting no government bailouts or loans. Sure over my head neighbor, but back in 2009, the good old US Department of Energy give ‘em a loan for $529,000,000! A little extra change in your pocket can't hurt none.

That Dept. of Energy is real good at loanin’ out our money. They also give a $465,000,000 loan to Tesla Motors. Maybe you ain’t heard of them either. Tesla is another California company that makes an electric roadster that sells for even more than that Fisker car. And even though it cost more, only 2 people can ride at a time.

Nobody's sayin' when these loans gotta get paid back. Ain’t even heard if they gotta pay interest on 'em. Anyway, that Energy Dept. got a heap more money stashed away to “loan” to big companies like Fisker and Tesla. In fact, they got $8 billion set aside, all totaled!

Here’s the best part neighbor. First them politicians in Washington fixed it to “loan” our money to companies that make expensive cars. Them that us folks can’t afford. Shucks, I could buy 2 cars and a new diesel pickup 4x4 for what one of them cars cost. And now, they’re playin’ games with the money that’s supposed to help them folks that got wiped out by disasters like that Joplin tornado and that hurricane Irene. Them Republicans want to take somewhere's 'round $1 billion of that automobile company bailout/loan/welfare money and use it for the disaster relief. Naturally the Democrats don’t cotton much to that idea and plan to block that disaster aid until Republicans give the welfare money back to the big corporations. They’d rather add that $1 billion to the national debt instead.

Now hang on there a minute Jethro. I know I’m getting’ old, but this here is a might confusin’. Democrats are for the working man. Republicans are for big business. Ain’t that what we been hearing all these years? So why are Republicans taking money from big business to give to folks in need? And why are Democrats holdin’ out until big business gets their welfare back? Reckon I gotta go over to the couch and ponder this for a while. In the meantime, remember, I am…
Justan O. Geezer