Wildlife Idiots

Well neighbor, I been thinkin’ bout what’s happened out there in Depoe Bay, Oregon.  That’s a town that sets right there on the Pacific Ocean.  Ain’t much bigger than Mayberry.  Course it ain’t as quiet.  That’s ‘cause they got a big old 4-lane runnin’ right thru town.  Reckon you might a heard of that road - Highway 101.  The one that’s bout as far west as you can get and runs from Mexico all the way up to Canada.  They got lots of folks in town most the year too.  Tourists.  Depoe Bay calls itself the “Whale watching capitol of Oregon.”  They say some grey whales hang out just off shore for 10 months of the year.

They also lay claim to having the “smallest navigable harbor in the world.”  You can maneuver your bass boat ‘round there easy, but your skiin’ jet boat might get a little tricky.  Ain’t ‘cause the harbor’s that small.  It’s 6 acres.  You see, the problem is that harbor’s loaded with them floatin’ docks from the local marinas!  Don’t believe me?  Go google up a picture, Junior.

Anyway, every 4^th of July the Chamber of Commerce puts on a shindig.  You know, music, prize drawings, sidewalk sales and such.  Been doin’ it for years.  Folks look forward to it.  Naturally, they top it off with a big fireworks show come sundown. 

Well not this year neighbor!  They had to cancel the fireworks.  Seems the US Fish and Wildlife Service said so.  Them fireworks is disturbing the Brandt’s Cormorants near town.  That’s a big black sea bird, Clyde.  Kinda ugly, if you ask me.  It ain’t even one of them “endangered species” or nothing.  No sir.  Them good folks at the Wildlife Service is just doin’ their job and enforcing the law.  That’d be the 1918 Migratory Bird Treaty Act.

So, if I understand right, all that traffic on Highway 101, all them whale-watchin’ tourists and the music and stuff from that 4^th of July party don’t bother the birds none.  Just the fireworks.  Like the younguns put it, “Just saying.”

Justan O. Geezer