Flawed Folks

The other day, I had to make a trip in to Perry’s Barber Pole.  You know, time to get my ears lowered again.  When I got there, Harry had Clyde Hammond, our local banker, in the chair.  They was jawin' about Clyde's wife Marylou and how every time she goes into town, she comes home with some new piece of clothing she didn't need but just had to have.  Clyde said the closet is so full that half of his things are out in the front closet.  Well you could see that Clyde was puttin' it on the front porch that he considered that to be a major flaw in her personality.  Of course the subject didn't matter none to Harry.  He'll talk about anything to anybody.  

Now you know me neighbor, I kinda like stuckin' my nose into things.  So I commented that, if you think about it, all us folk are flawed somehow or other.  And it gets pointed out to us all the time.  Like all them nature shows on TV.  They like to take us out behind the barn for messin' up the planet or endangering some kinda of snail or something.  And heck, near'y every Sunday, some preacher's up there making it plain that if we don't straighten up, we're headin' straight to hell.  It's for sure there's plenty wrong with me too.  I get told 'bout it near'y every day!    

After hearing that, Clyde kinda simmered down a bit and agreed.  Everybody's got somethin' they ain't right proud of.  Now ol' Harry could see this conversation had just about run outta steam.  Naturally, he couldn't let that happen.  He said just 2 words, "ALMOST everybody."  OK, so it ended up being a bunch more than 2 words when he got done.  He just had to explain to us that some folks can't bring themselves to even consider they ain't perfect.  He named somebody, but I'll do my good deed for the day an' not say who.  But AMEN Harry.  Yep, there are exceptions all right.  

Reckon you know the rest. That conversation was right back up in high gear.  Harry finished cuttin' Cyde's hair... and mine.  They was still at it when I left.  But, you know neighbor, there really are some 'perfect' folks like that.  ....After thinkin' about it some, mostly they're Congressmen and Presidents and such.  Well that's what I think.  As always, I am...
Justan O. Geezer

Apocalypse Party

Howdy neighbors.  Hope you're doin' as good as I am... in spite of all the rain.

This mornin' I got a note from a neighbor up the road a piece.  He wanted me to pass along an invite to this here shindig up in the city next week.  Reckon I owe him the favor, so here it is:
 

______________________________________________________________

- Senior -

Post-Apocalypse PARTY

“Party like there's no tomorrow!”

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>>> Fun and Games for all! <<<

Checkers

Dominoes

Penny Ante

AND Bingo!

FREE snacks and beverages

Let it all hang out!

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When: Thursday

Why wait till the weekend? You're retired, right?!

Where: County General Hospital Parking Lot

- Generously arranged by County's ER Dept. -

Time: 2 PM to 7PM

(You'll be home by dark – if you can last that long)

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Free rides to and from

Donated by General Ambulance Service, Inc.

Drugs and liniment available!

  Ibuprofen, Tylenol, Colace, Digitalis, Ben-Gay and more!

_________________________________________________________

Well there you have it.  Hope y'all enjoy the party.  I'm plannin' on being there too.  Till then, I am, as always...
Justan O. Geezer

The Next President (& Vice-President) of the USA

Howdy neighbor.  I know, seems like last week we was listening all them campaign commercials.  But here it is, campaign time again.  Heck, the election's less than 2 years away you know!   Makes you kinda wish Tom, John, Ben and the guys had hung on to them British election laws, don't it.  That way them politicians would spend more time doin' the job we're paying 'em for. 

 

Of course you know its time 'cause the President already announced he'll run for another term.  But that ain't the only reason.  You noticed how all them crises we had kinda got moved to the back burner?  You know, Social Security and Medicare and the like can wait a little longer.  Right?  Also, have you noticed the President's got time for them town meetings again?  And have you noticed how the blame game got goin' again?  Yep, all the signs are there. 

 

Most folks say it's way too early to make any predictions about the outcome of that next election.  After all, won't be till next summer that they officially choose who's running.  Well maybe so, but I been known to do some crazy things in my day and even make a prediction every once in a while.  Now I can see this one comin' just as clear as the air after a cold front passes.  Reckon it's time to put it down in writin' before I forget. 

 

Ain't going to waste no words. The way I see it, unless something real bad (and I mean REAL bad) happens in the next year and a half, President Obama's going have his second term.  First off, the incumbent's always got an advantage.   But besides that, them Republicans still ain't got nobody that'll be able to fend off all that dirt diggin', name-callin', and fun makin' that's gonna happen.  Mark my words friend, that's the way it'll be no matter who they pick.   Even more so if they put a woman on the ticket.  Not only that, but I hear tell the Democrats and their supporters still got lots of cash to spend.  Them anti-anything-conservative-or-Tea Party-or-Republican commercials will be agoin' before your plantin' is done.  There might even be another "timely" movie come out of Hollywood 'fore it's over.  Come to think of it, some of the unions are already busy up there in Wisconsin and over in Ohio. You know, that “assault on worker’s rights” thing?

But no matter. Here's the kicker, Clyde. (And I ain't got time for no conspiracy stuff, so I ain't saying there was some kinda deal made either.)  I'm bettin' that ol' Joe Biden is gonna decide to retire from politics just about cultivating time next year.  As I see it, there's only one logical choice for a replacement.  A former Senator.  A person close to a former President.  And now a diplomat known around the world.  And a woman.  Now if that don't guarantee success nothing will.  Hillary will be the solution to keeping the White House for 12 to 16 years and satisfying a very ambitious person.

All right, call me a crazy old coot.  Don't mind at all.  In fact somebody in my house has taken pride in pointin' out how wrong I am for many years.  Kinda used to it.  But we'll talk 'bout this again sometime neighbor.  Till then, I am...

Justan O. Geezer

Bad Roads

Well neighbor, like I told you the other day, I was out traveling 'round. And you know, it ain't till you get to travel a bit that you come realize just how many roads we got in this here country. Now I ain't talkin' about local roads here 'cause folks got there share of gravel and dirt roads everywhere . And most of us kinda like it that way. You take it slow, you don't raise too much dust and you get there anyway.

Over the past few months I got to ride on a bunch of them Interstate Highways. Now I gotta hand it to old Dwight D. Eisenhower for having the gum-shun to get that project goin'. Of course at the time, we was all pretty scared of them Russians and the Cold War and such. Ol' Dwight thought we could use some good roads to move troops and stuff around the country in a hurry. Nowadays, we couldn't do without them just for getting crops to market.

Reminds me. In most states, besides them US Highways, you got your State Highways and County or Parish Roads. But down in Texas, they do it a bit different. Naturally they got all the regular roads. You know, the Toll Roads and Park Roads and Business Routes and the like. But besides all that, they got some down right descriptive designations. Down there you see roads like FM1368 and RM311. That would be a "farm to market" road or a "ranch to market" road. They call 'em that just 'cause that's what they are (or were).

Anyway, lie I said, I spent a bunch of time on them Interstate highways. Most of 'em are in pretty good shape, at least once you get away from the big cities. But let me tell you friend, some ain't fit for a buggy at any speed. I seen some that 'll rattle the teeth right out of your mouth. To me, Arkansas and Indiana got the worst Interstate Highways in the country! Over there in Arkansas, you better hope it don't rain none. When it does, you might do better in a boat. The tracks worn down them asphalt roads are more like the chutes at your favorite water park, my friend. Slidin' down the road just ain't no fun.

Now up there in Indiana, it's a different story. If you'd just stay around Indianapolis, you'd think you was in hog heaven. The Interstate System around that city is real good and if you head out past the airport, you'd think you got on a runway by mistake! Some places, there's like 6 to 8 lanes in each direction and that don't count the marginal road. Once you get away from that "Circle City," it ain't pretty, neighbor. In fact, if you can get to the state border without getting shook to death, you can bet your truck's lost half its bolts and maybe a tire too. Don't take my word for it neighbor - but don't blame me fer not warnin' you. 

 

Now I'll be the first to tell ya, I don't know why them roads are in such bad shape. Maybe they never got none of that "stimulus" money to fix 'em. Or maybe they outsourced the maintenace to India, but I reckon I'll be driving around them states rather than through them next time.

I know our economic problems have affected road maintenance, just like everything else.  And all the roads 'round the country show need for some upkeep.  But it sho 'nough can't explain why you can tell which state your in by the rattle of your teeth.

Got my teeth back in now and settle in some, but I am still...

Justan O. Geezer

Maybe the prophet was right.

Howdy neighbor. Yep, been a while.  Reckon you realize I ain't died or nothin' like that.  What I done was, I got good friend (and neighbor) to look after the place so's I could do some traveling.  Seen lots of stuff out there, good and bad.  Naturally, I got a bunch to say about it, but first there's more important things.

Since I've been "on the road again" like Willie says, things been happening all over the world. Them folks over there in Japan ain't never gonna be the same you know.  One disaster after another and all in a few days. Reckon them media people been burnin' the oil to come up with more "stories" about it everyday.  But neighbor, what is real important is all them folks that been affected.  They need all the help we can give 'em and lots of prayers too.  And don't forget the other people like those in Haiti that still ain't got no homes.  They ain't no wheres back to normal or even close.

Of course with all that's happened, we're gonna feel it too.  Pretty soon you won't be able to buy any of them rice-burnin' cars that save on gas.  And you can already see the greedy retailers hiking the prices on TVs and cellphones.  Yep, we're going feel their pain.

There's another strange thing happening in Egypt and Libya and all them Moslem countries.  They're all having uprisings at the same time.  Not to say that it ain't long over due, but all at once?  In the meantime, our folks in Washington been workin' just as fast as they usually do.  Even the UN was faster this time.  Of course the UN got 'bout as many teeth as me.  And as always, the tyrants are sayin' one thing then doin' another.  Seems likely Gaddafi will have plenty of time to kill enough of his own people so he can stay in power.  Eventually, somebody's gonna have to go in there and "remove him from power."  In case you don't know it Clyde, thems code words for another war.

Any way, between all them earthquakes, tsunamis, nuclear melt-downs, uprisings and such, it jogged my memory about Edgar Cayce, the so called "Sleeping Prophet."  Maybe he was right about earth changes and it was only that his timing was off.  You young'uns can go Google that or whatever it is you do.

Well, I got lots other stuff to tell 'bout my travels and such, but I reckon it'll have to wait till next time.  For now, just remember, I am...

Justan O. Geezer