Aqui

Well neighbor, today was Election Day here just like everywhere else in the good ole US of A.  And yessir, I done my civic duty.  ‘Course I didn’t want to get into no rush hour what with all the young folks wantin’ to vote before they headed out to work or chores and stuff.  So I wandered over to the schoolhouse round lunchtime.  Right nice.  No waiting at all. 

But let me tell you neighbor, that was the must cornfusing ballot I ever did see.  We was only voting on a mayor and councilman, a few state and county issues and 1 local issue.  They wanted to know if we’d let the market sell beer and wine on Sunday after 1PM.  But that took up 2 of them big ballot pages, front and back!  The problem was I couldn’t even read half of it!

Last time around they had them fancy new computer things.  That weren’t too bad.  Better than them punch the holes things.  But this time, they went back to a mark the circle paper ballot.  Now that woulda been OK by me, if it weren’t half in a foreign language.  Now I know there ain’t nobody in town that can’t speak English.  And I reckon everybody in the county is the same.  Oh there might be a couple migrants around that ain’t got their English down pat.  But they don’t live here permanent, so they can’t vote here (I don’t think).

Well anyway, it took a while to work my way through that thing.  Pickin’ between English and Spanish.  Reckon I shoulda known there’d be a problem when I saw them signs out front of the school.  They said, “Vote, aqui, here” (on 3 lines). 

I think this 2 language stuff is a waste of my tax dollars.  And it’s down right stupid in towns where citizens ain’t got a problem with English.  I say, nobody that ain’t a citizen should be allowed to vote.  AND nobody that can’t speak English should be a citizen.  But what do I known, I am…

Justan O. Geezer